I have lived with a group of 2-4 girls now for about 3 years. Most people respond with a shocking look and “How?” response.
I get it for sure. There is always some anxiety that comes with throwing together 5 different personalities in a house. So many shared spaces: the kitchen, the den, the bathrooms, etc.
I have been extra thankful for every single person I have lived with including all past roomies and my roomies now. There is something special about sharing a living space and learning how to work together to keep a positive morale in the house.
I would say us 806 chicks (our nickname) past and present have done a pretty good job with this, and I attribute our success of living together to one specific characteristic: our authenticity with one another.
In a living space and any relationship, it is SO important to be and stay authentically yourself.
Don’t hide behind phrases and responses that will please the other person. That is forfeiting yourself and what you want as a person.
One of my favorite quotes is by Lysa Terkeurst from her book Uninvited: “There is an abundant need in this world for your exact brand of beautiful” (Terkeurst 126). There is a demand for you everyday. The you that is real and true.
In the midst of a house conflict or dirty kitchen needing to be cleaned, I am not afraid to tell the other roomies it is their turn to clean or to apologize for my lack of cleanliness.
Now, we all have our fair share of faults and by no means is our house perfect, but we are real and cherish that realness. In the imperfect moments, we stay our imperfect selves and recognize there is beauty even in the imperfect.
It may not feel as though your real, authentic self is always cherished, but it is beautiful and needed.
In being yourself, the tiresome nature of trying to hide your authenticity will be eliminated.
You were made perfectly you, so honor that because the world, others, and the Lord need that!
Galatians 1:10 says, “Am I now trying to win the approval of human beings, or of God? Or am I trying to please people? If I were still trying to please people, I would not be a servant of Christ” (Galatians 1:10). Trying to please others by forfeiting who you are displeases the Lord, and it becomes exhausting.
There is no one that loves your real self and your exact brand of beauty more than the Lord, and that’s the only love that satisfies. Rejoice in your own Spirit of authenticity and know that it is that spirit that is most loved by the perfect Lover.
Love always, Katie Girl
Terkeurst, Lysa. Uninvited: Living Loved When You Feel Less Than, Left out, and Lonely. Nelson Books, 2016.